I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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