why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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