you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Randomize
