it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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