im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize