If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize