He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize