you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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