You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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