Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
