all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I have fence marks all over my body
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
