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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.

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• (408): View more from California

  ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.

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• (941): View more from Florida

  My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"

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• (308): View more from Nebraska

  Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.

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• (631): View more from New York

  I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead

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• (423): View more from Tennessee

  I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?

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• (434): View more from Virginia

  After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.

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