So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize