Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
