my vag is so smooth its legendary
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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