let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
