why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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