my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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