Betty ford says i'm here all night
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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