I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
