So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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