yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I want to fling myself into the sun
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
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