You're so nebulous sometimes
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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