I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
