I can't watch pbs sober anymore
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Randomize
