Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
they're like a gay fantastic four
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Randomize
