It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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