# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize