At least make sure they are 18
Why
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
