One girl and one boy is just not enough.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
