You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
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I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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