ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Randomize
