I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize