and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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