low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
