Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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