we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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