I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
You are the jesus of drinking
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
