guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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