For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
There's even glitter on my cock...
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