hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
you traded sex for a burrito?
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize