Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
