I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Randomize
