thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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