You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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