Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize
