but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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