I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
