the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
