Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
