I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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